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2010 Olympia Co-Ed Traveling Team |
By Elizabeth “K.” Drake
Richland, WA – The “Rally to Restore Sanity: The Other Washington” took place over Halloween weekend at Hanford High School in Richland. Fly-overs by the military indicate there were approximately 150 in attendance of the rally. Participants of the “real” rally in D.C. were in excess of 200,000, according to some reports.
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Andrew D., Joe, Troy (!), Tache, Lucho, Andrew, Jean (kneeling) Pam, Hannah, Jeff, Will, Armand (next row)Lisa, Kathy, Corey, Beth |
Team Olympia, dubbed “O’Rally”, traveled nearly 4 hours to play in partial rain on Saturday and moderate, but consistent winds on Sunday. Signs, such as “Olympia: Anarchists, Conservatives, and ME!” and “Restore Sanity: Dump and Swing” were prominent along the sideline.
The new captains, Will and Hannah, and their transition team are preparing for an all-out overhaul on honey plays. As Will rubbed Hannah’s waistline he said, “When I’m full-season captain, there won’t be any third-party questioning about whether I’m wearing love goggles or have my Handar on. Hannah’s da bomb, just look at her.”
And it’s true. Hannah’s captaining style is to lead by example. Except somehow, none of the other ladies make layout D’s like Ms. Wahl.
The younger of the team sisters, Pam, said “Will definitely beats Big Dog in my book.” She further stated, “We even got a last round bye so we could Pre-Party Pam.”
When players got excessive over the weekend, they were asked by their teammates to maintain sanity and “take it down a notch”. Moderation and “reasonable defense” was the key to their success resulting in 6 wins over the weekend and only one loss to none other than their pyromaniac nemesis Tacoma. O’Rally placed 5th out of 24 teams.
Corey was asked to comment on Will and Hannah’s captaining record. He shrugged and walked to his usual hangout on the far sideline. He lamented, “Going 0 and 6-and-a-half is not that bad, really,” referring to his Hanford captaining days of 2005— the worst in O history.
The female captain’s award went to Kathy for “excellent enthusiasm” and all-around “good play.” Ms. Young said, “ ‘Bout damn time. I haven’t won the Captain’s Award since my fabulous performance at Hanford 2008.” Reports say that’s when the cougar was let out of the cage.
New tournament player in Olympia, Jeff, won the male captain’s award. He declined to comment as he ran around the fields during his cool down sprints. Jeff was awarded for being the only player left standing at the end of 7 games and scoring more than 65 percent of O’Rally’s total points.
Other new tournament players included Jean, Joe, Armand, and Tasche from Bremerton. All new teammates played reasonably well and with reasonable enthusiasm and team captains said we hope to see them out again.
Oldtime player, Troy, “The Godfather of Olympia Ultimate”, reportedly used an 800 count bottle of ibuprofen over the weekend. When asked if he would play in other tournaments, he said, “I’m not certain I can afford enough ibuprofen in this economy.”
The only non-democratic leader of team Olympia, Andrew, dressed as a mermaid for the rally. When asked about Sex-Docs, the Society for EX-Dictators and Olympia Captains, he said “It’s so unfair. They (Sex-Docs) treat me like an outcast for being a former dictator.” Andrew stated that he felt his status would change once his elite-level girlfriend, Wynne, moved to Olympia to play with team O as planned and promised by Andrew.
Reasonable captain Will asked the team via megaphone on Sunday morning how many teammates saw the random couple having sex in the hotel stairwell; half the team raised their hands. Although they didn’t know who the woman was, some claim they could identify her va-jay-jay in a lineup. Mandy reports that O’Rally likes to “keep it clean” at the party noting that the team partakes in wholesome activities such as playing euchre, drinking hot cider, dancing with teammates, and eating homemade brownies.
“This team is all about the camaraderie.” said Lisa, who remembered the days when women were paid to play. Nowadays, teams such as the University of Idaho, carry 18 women.
Lucho, a native Columbian who joined team O this year agreed with Lisa’s statement about camaraderie. “Estan muy loco!” he said, referring to O’Rally. “Pero, me gusta compañeros de equipo.” Lucho said he’ll miss the team when he returns to Columbia at the end of the month, but that he’s got no shortage of Americanized "your mom" lines and “that’s what she said” jokes.
"Put your entire team in the spotlight. Thanks to them, you're able to experience a level of success that you wouldn't have been able to achieve on your own. Remember that when it's your turn to help one of them out."